Denzel Washington Vows to Turn in his Badge

Denzel Washington, the famous black actor, recently told reporters he’d be unveiling a new Denzel from here on out. Washington, who is busy premiering his new movie, Déjà vu, in which he plays an ATF agent, said it would be "hard" and a "challenge" to play a different role. "I’ve got the cop/army authority thing so down. It’s like I’ve corned the decisive cop role market. Not being a cop in movies? It’s like waking up one morning and realizing that me and acting weren’t meant to be together! People think: Denzel, cop. It is two peas in a pod. Why do you think the Academy decided to give me an Oscar? They don’t like it when you change people’s perceptions. Malcolm didn’t win me that award, a crooked cop did. I know I’ve side stepped this issue for so long but I promise my fans that I will pull a switch that wont include Will Smith. I don’t have anything in mind when I’m saying this to you now, it’s just a whim or limb I’d like to branch out on. I’ve instructed my agent to only field roles that do not involve cops. I want to prove that Denzel is much more than your average actor cop. I really want to test my limits as an actor and get inside a different character’s head. But funny as this sounds, I almost want to retire from acting and become a cop, well, not a street cop, but like a detective cop where you investigate high profile, dramatic cases that lead you to finding the criminal and serving the due justice this country needs. When I told that to my agent, Rod, he laughed, ‘You wont be paid accordingly’. Heck, as an actor I could even go under cover, give autographs to these killers and then book ‘em. [Denzel then laughs with a smug grimace while staring at one reporter square in the eye, chewing two pieces of 21 minute-old Big Red gum that he’d like to spit out because they’ve fused together and now taste like cinnamon papier mache.] Maybe I’d like to do something less dramatic, something that doesn’t involve blood – something inspirational. I’ve got it: Remember the Actors."