You Hongry?

Damn right, bitch! Why you looking at me? Feed me already. Shit. I done lost three pounds since you been looking at me! You got a staring problem, huh? Ain't never seen someone that hungry? I exist all over the world. More people are like me than you. See, the belief of natural balance would say “Good needs evil”. There is equilibrium of justice. There is as much good as there is evil. To that effect, for you hoard balls, there are many more malnourished like us – the equilibrium is off kilter. And when forces such as these are off balance, destruction occurs. Darfur happens. For you to sit there and wastefully stuff your face, I and a host of others rummage for scraps. You allow the raccoon to feast off your spoils, while I wither and die. Am I not better than an animal? Oh, laugh won’t you, with the old joke, how does it go…, “How do you kill Somalians? Throw a turkey off a bridge!” Seriously though, send your relief money so that it can be intercepted by the barons that run our countries. Rest assured this Thanksgiving and holiday season thereafter, that your “aid” is completing your altruistic duties as “Westerners” and this upheaval, a cutting of the ridiculously sized ribbon by way of the even more exaggeratingly larger scissors, if you will, will end world hunger and squelch the violence that is occurring. For as long as you exist, you pot-bellied pig, I too, the scrawny, disfigured child of hope, will exist. We will be worlds away from each other, as this the picture is the only uniting factor, yet we’ll be opposing factors that need each other to survive. However, I feel as if you depend more on me than I on you. You give me shards of hope by way of food drops. Kraft EZ Mac & Cheese descends from the Heavens and our dismal lives have the chance now to eek out yet another day because of the plentiful, caloric intake of the glorious corporate invention: macaroni and cheese. But please, dear sir, do send instructions for the EZ Mac & Cheese next time. Remember, we’re Africans? Don’t continue to torture us because my life depends on it.