The Doghouse

The case is simple: this cat is out of control. Michael Vick has been taken out of the house and tossed outside. When headlines continually focus on actions other than your main profession, something is wrong; the problem is you.

First he was sort of a problem child at Virginia Tech. Those fears quited down as football scouts bluntly thought “Who cares, look at the nigger run!” As bad as that sounds, it’s probably close to the truth. So he zooms past everybody, throws balls out of stadiums (Powerade commercial) and turns himself into more of a running back than a quarterback. But soon his shitty core of receivers fell flat: Pierless Price and Brian Finneran. Thereafter defenses catch onto him and the Falcons' offensive strategies (which, if you ask me, is wait 7 seconds and let Vick run that way). The playoffs became an uncertainty.

Off the field? Let’s start. I forgot what happened at Virginia Tech. I know he “knowingly” gave a woman herpes. Well, the numerous, if endless, marijuana gaffes have defined Vick in recent years. If SNL decides to get in your ass, then, um, it’s deserved. “Really. Really? Really!” And drum roll please, the encore: Dog fighting. Real—now I believe what players, people, do in their own time is their business. If you say, perhaps, enjoy having sex in a stairway in a club, Dwight Smith, or domestic disputes (abuse), Jason Kidd, you are entitled privacy in personal matters. Not so though as stars are under the malagined microscope every minute (see Alec Baldwin and his message to his daughter) for anything they do, regardless of what it may in fact be; buying a Coke, rather than a Pepsi, is a news story these days.

I’m not sticking up for Vick, hence I would not be writing this. But I strongly believe his illegal dog fighting is none of my or the NFL’s concern. However, you start to wonder that there is a problem. Vick, and the others (Tank Johnson, Pac Man Jones, the whole Cinnci team), have let their dogs out. They are the reason for their undoing, water cooler talk, sports radio nuts getting their 2 cents in, rising lawyer fees and recently, suspensions without pay. Being an athlete receives recognition and for many of its black players it’s a means to “make it out of the ghetto” (okay, all of them minus Grant Hill). How does that Chris Rock joke go again? Again, they should not be subservient to the masters, the owners, ad powerhouses and television companies. But when you’re paid $127 million, you should try to change. I mean, go to church or something. Dog fighting? Really. Why? How? Can’t you be giving other women herpes instead of dog fighting? Feds are searching his house as we speak and to me that’s a little much. Vick is like Paris Hilton, they’re both spoiled bitches that, due to their past actions, now must (or in Paris’ case, should have) pay consequences.

Vick should let his play on the field determine his press coverage. Revolutionize the quarterbacking position even more than your predecessor, Steve McNair.