This Old Whore

First, I have no affiliation with sir Bob Vila, so FUCK BOB VILA. That’s actually what I did though (I have serviced him a few times). Anyways, hello, my name is Hope. I am 37, have two children I stopped caring for years ago and a long forgotten husband that I wont speak of. We had some foundation problems – can’t you tell, building trust wasn’t one of his strong points. Well, I come to you this week to introduce myself. I’ve been contracted to do a weekly column by KissMyAssPlz, (he’s a regular customer by the way, details later) so tune in every Wednesday for a new adventure into the unknown life of a 4th street hooker. I will tell you all of the gruesome details that I deal with day in, day out. Don’t get it wrong my job gets tough and there have been times I’ve questioned what I do, but ultimately I love it – it’s extremely hands on! I get to meet all new kinds of people, from all walks of life. I had a carpenter in last week and even a famous movie star just the day after yesterday. See I help people every night release their stress. Name calling, pulling and scratching and the exploration of taboo places are the channels in which this stress is permitted. And yes, I have gotten sick, but I don’t have anything now if you’d heard any of those other hairless whore’s rumors. I’m so not expensive – I’m a good for the money. I’m not classy, nor do I have restrictions – I’ll do anything! All in all I’m trying to give whores a good name as most of them trash it up for the rest of us. I make a man (and some women) feel good and uplift their spirits nightly (not to mention the coke I get for a treat). So if you ever have any questions (girlfriends plz feel free to comment for tips, I know how to plz any man) or comment and I will answer them. I’ll see you here next Wednesday – what mischief can I get into to tell you?